[11:39am]

Today is a bit of a hard day, but I’m trying to stay positive. My exam did not go well at all, and when I came back to the lab, I found my PI talking to the other Masters student in our lab and he was listing to her all the things he has been doing (as he should). He is doing so much more than me and excelling, even though we’re both Masters students. I’m not so much envious of him, as I am disappointed in myself. Every week I wonder if I’m doing enough, or if I’m smart enough for this. I just feel really slow, y’know? 

[9:28pm]

Listen, my plan was to be in lab for <3hrs, because that’s what I do on Tuesdays and Thursdays since I have lectures on those days. Then, not really wanting to, I told my mentor to let me know if he’s planning on doing experiments and I’d be happy to come back to lab. On this particular day, I was not happy to do this. I was really looking forward to coming back home early, resting, and getting some other work done afterwards. But nope, ended up going back to the lab, and being there for 3 more hours. Tomorrow I’ll be spending all day in lab, with two meetings, a career fair to attend and a volunteer activity after work. I am tired, too tired to even do the work I had planned to do tonight. At the same time though, I want to recognize that yes, I did put in more work than I intended today, and I did it all to the best of my abilities (even though I was not necessarily in the mood). I also went out with some friends afterward for boba, and it was really nice to breathe for a bit. Although now, I really need supernatural strength to get anything else done. 

-Moonie x.

Photo Context: I got a bunch of baby breaths the other day and they made me so happy 🙂 getting flowers in general does that to me. The housing I live in is really old (and looks it), so I try to do little things like this to brighten it up 🌻